How to Embarrass Your Friends!

#1 You go to a child friendly restaurant and bring along your two youngest children.

#2 You get seated at the table with the cutest waiter in the joint and start talking about how really cute his eyes are and how nice his smile is and how he is probably the same age as said friend.  This will draw her attention and get her interest.

#3 Wait until the totally cute waiter is there to take your order and you now have HIS interest too.

#4 Once scene is set and everyone is in place, give the youngest child a straw....with paper on it and have the scene unfold below...........

Delaney: *blows the paper at friend and just misses sending it down her shirt!*  Delaney giggles and whispers to me "I almost got it down her boobies!" 

The Friend: (this is a lesson to be learned) Interested in what we are giggling about says to Delaney, "What did you say?"  (you know what is coming right?!)

Me: "Don't tell her now Delaney.  Wait until we order."

Delaney: *still giggling* Announcing very loudly, "I ALMOST GOT THE PAPER DOWN YOUR BOOBIES!!!" and breaks out in laughter

Megan: *rolls on the seat laughing*

The Friend: *laughs and turns the brightest shade of red*

The Cute Waiter: *laughs and is turning an even brighter red*

Now....somewhere in this hysterical laughter, place a very loud laughing SNORT from someone!  And you now have the loudest table in the restaurant laughing so hard they cannot stop and getting dirty looks from the older couple sitting nearby.

The end result......pee'd pants on my part, a very embarrassed friend, a waiter who cannot walk by without turning red and laughing, two little girls who think this night was the funniest thing they ever saw and...........no future date to be had by said friend!